Loss of what could have been
I was talking with my therapist this week about my weight loss journey. I've been working on the emotions behind the over eating and just didn't feel like I had figured it out yet. We narrowed it down to something that happens in my relationships. My first marriage, as well as my second. So my therapist asked my about my first husband...how we met, etc. I gave him the run down of events and then began to tell him about my first miscarriage. I was five months pregnant and, I was clear to indicate that I did not feel any motherly bond, or that I thought my baby had died. I've only told the complete story to a few people, not letting on how traumatic the experience was. For the first time, I teared up when telling my therapist. I realize that I brushed off any feelings about not only the miscarriage, but that whole relationship and the abuse and terrible ending. I did not allow myself to grieve or validate any emotions at all because I had made a series of bad choices that le...